How to Support Yourself and Others with Anxiety

Is it possible to thrive when you or a loved one has anxiety?

Anxiety is most commonly known for its chronic worrying, ruminating and fearful thinking. If you or someone you love suffers from anxiety, you know how debilitating and exhausting it can be. When left untreated anxiety can reinforce counterproductive behaviors such as procrastination, anxious mood and overthinking.

People with anxiety can benefit from hearing it is not their fault. Research shows up to thirty percent of the symptoms of anxiety can be inherited. When sharing this information, I think it is important to include a message of hope. There is a growing body of research on altering the genes which can make you prone to anxiety and addiction in the first place.

More good news, a Harvard study found, “evidence that the mere act of clearing your mind for 15 minutes each day actually alters how your genes operate.” The study focused on the benefits of meditation over an eight-week period. With that said, there are other ways to clear your mind such as getting out in nature, walking, breathing or taking a break from social media.

In my work with individuals with anxiety, I find they benefit greatly from consistency and structure. Anxious people perform extremely well when they are prepared ahead of time. Whether it be visiting a new school several times before attending or getting a heads up on the plans for the weekend, taking this extra step can alleviate a lot of stress.

It is essential to find a plan, program or tool that works best for them. Not all therapies, treatments or approaches are created equal. If something isn’t helping, I suggest you move on and find something that will. Remember anxious people tend to doubt themselves so it is important to encourage yourself or loved one to trust their gut and do what feels right.

It is not enough to just hand someone with anxiety a list of tools and strategies. This could actually increase feelings of overwhelm and frustration. Should this occur, I strongly encourage you or your loved one seek support. Perhaps a teacher, doctor, coach, therapist, guidance counselor or trusted friend. You may also find support through books, and online courses.

The key is to start small, think baby steps, the first one being to acknowledge you need help. Keep in mind anxious people are frightened, they need to feel safe, cared for and accepted. If you approach an anxious person with a let’s fix it mentality, they are likely to feel isolated or misunderstood. On the other hand, if you tip toe around it, try not to upset the anxious person, this is likely to make matters worse. Instead, offer comfort, and pats on the back. Trust you and/or your anxious loved one has the ability to get through anything and come out stronger than before. Believe it or not words and phrases such as, everything is going to be okay, can go a long way.

Recommended Readings:

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